Sunday, February 7, 2010

Stacey's Story

I'm so excited to be posting our first adoption story (other than my own, of course). It goes along perfectly with yesterday's post about whose world will be saved.

Thank you, Stacey, for sharing with us.

A note from Stacey:

Hi Julie, I read about your blog on one of the yahoo groups and thought I’d stop in with my story. I’m in the same sort of boat as you… mid 30’s, single and more than anything just want to be a mom. I’m looking forward to hearing more about your journey and your family now. I’m still in the early process – waiting for a referral from Perm. Here is my starting point… the “why” behind it all. Thanks for starting this blog – I think it will be a nice way for people to come together for support and to share. All the best in 2009! Stacey

Stacey's Story:
In my blog my first entry captures the how I got here and it is titled, “Two wrongs might just make a right”.

Once upon a time, long long ago, I married the most amazing person I have ever known… I married my best friend. Some might say that "Love at first sight" is for dreamers or fools... well, I guess we were both. Scott was an amazing man full of life, light, passion, and humor - he was everything I ever dreamt of in a husband. We shared so many adventures in our time together but the best part was how he could make me laugh until my stomach hurt or smile by just walking into a room. He made me want to be a better person and together we wanted to raise a family.

We knew we would be good parents and we knew that the adventures we shared as a couple would be made even better by sharing them with children... that was not to be. On April 30th, 1999, Scott died beside me in a roll over car accident. The years following that were the hardest I might ever have to endure. Through the tears, grief, pain, and sorrow I've learned that life and the dream of love and a family does go on... albeit in a different way. So here I am... 9 years later contemplating my family in a way so different than before but in my heart feels so right.

You see, I lost my family, my security, my love, my protection and my future when I lost Scott... and it took a long, long time to be able to picture my days without him... without my dreams. And I'm an adult. Somewhere, in an orphanage far away, there are children who, in ways that likely feel very much the same, lost their family, security, love, protection and future... perhaps this is one of the few exceptions to the rule where "Two wrongs might just make a right".

Just after we were married, Scott and I had a conversation that can only be classified as foreshadowing. He told me that if he were to die, he would want me to go on and be happy. He wanted me to find love again, be a mom and a wife. Now he didn’t say in what order that might happen… so here I am. I am going to be a mom. Adopting won’t erase the hurts and disappointments’ of my or my sons life, but together, there will be more hugs, more laughter, better memories and much, much more love. I have a listing of great quotes on my blog… the one I’ll close with is, “Love is the answer… now what was the question?”

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